jill-bird:

You see Spongebob,  It’s a metaphor. You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but never give it the power to kill you.

jill-bird:

You see Spongebob,
It’s a metaphor. You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but never give it the power to kill you.

74,261 notes

fartgallery:

kids that look exactly like one of their parents are so weird, it’s like they’re the lowercase and uppercase versions of a person

217,572 notes

skelitas:

i’m basically “pro-do whatever you want as long as you’re enjoying yourself and not hurting other people”

526,355 notes

officialunitedstates:

officialmexico:

texas

no you can’t have it back stop asking

200,694 notes

jalexaremyhomeboys:

reasons i don’t want to do a presentation in front of my class:

  • my voice shakes
  • i go all red 
  • i’m ugly
  • people will be looking at me
  • i’M UGLY AND PEOPLE WILL BE LOOKING AT ME AND MY VOICE WILL GO ALL WEIRD THIS IS AN ISSUE

256,526 notes

mamacastiel:

IM FUFCKING CRYING AT THIS PICTURE OF A DUCK

FUC KING LOOK AT THIS SHIT

image

IT’S LIKE

no

image

d ont hurt my childern

49,814 notes

fuckerpunch:

i never realize how much i swear until i’m in a situation where i can’t

(Source: untongue)

489,246 notes

lameborghini:

getting caught taking selfies in public changes u as a person

235,291 notes

dampsandwich:

LOWERCASE JUST DOESN’T DO IT FOR ME ANYMORE

98,555 notes

religiousmom:

people should have antlers how cool would that be

74 notes

cusswordsayer:

fatwink:

weak unprepared people sleep naked. what are you gonna do when a robber comes in your house and see you naked? ?your material possessions can be replaced but your dignity cannot. 

the robber will be so blown away by my massive DONG that he will have SO MUCH RESPECT for me and my MASSIVE PENIS that he will put all the stuff back and walk out. all because of my COLOSSAL MEMBER.

166,887 notes

distinctmemory:

missbrostrider:

This fucking photo ruined my life whenever I think about it I burst out laughing I have gotten so many detentions cause of this fucking cat duckface monster

omg

distinctmemory:

missbrostrider:

This fucking photo ruined my life whenever I think about it I burst out laughing I have gotten so many detentions cause of this fucking cat duckface monster

omg

162,595 notes

perchu:

strikeupthebandom:

what the hell is going on

come find out

perchu:

strikeupthebandom:

what the hell is going on

come find out

190,118 notes

I forgot what I sent you
ancient snapchat proverb (via tentacoolaid)

48,114 notes